I'm The Guy

THE GUY. The one who is always there for a friend in need.  A shoulder to cry on.  A hand to hold.  The one who people are drawn to for a listening ear.  I'm also the guy who faces many tissues alone.  Fighting my own thoughts & internal battles by myself. Still, a guy who would do anything to make another smile.  Do everything I can to diminish a problem, mediate in a time of stress, alleviate emotional trauma.  Dump it all on me.  I welcome it.  If it means helping someone's happiness, lay that shit on me.  I am much stronger than I look ;)

THE GUY all friends go to for advice on relationships, life, job stress, romance, family problems, friendship issues, drama galore, clothing recommendations, hair consultations and I LOVE it.  I cherish the fact that I can have even a small impact on someone's life.  That could mean getting their mind off of a serious topic, a guy, a girl, a blouse.  Helping them to make an important decision.  Forcing them to analyze their emotions and reach deep.  Making them laugh until they cry.  Making them cry until they laugh.  This makes life worth living. 

I am THE GUY who can not make a relationship last more than a few months, no life of romance, I don't have a perfect sense of who I am by far, no such thing as a life without problems.  But do people realize that? I give solid advice whole heartedly yet there's a sense of uncertainty on my end.  Do others realize that, I too, need that hand, that shoulder, that ear on occasion?

Recently more than ever,  I'm the guy to be the mediator.  Trying to diminish small fires before they engulf a family.  I'm the guy with a wide smile in the situation of overwhelming frustration.  Trying to enlighten & brighten with sunshine and rainbows.  I'm the one with the seat belt on in the car for hours with ears & heart wide open. Trying to take away that emotional burden and crush it beneath my tires if that means helping you to drive forward.

This guy does not want recognition.  Not looking for a pat on the back. No.  I don't want to be rewarded for kindness or generosity.  That couldn't be further from the truth.  In life,  showing you care requires action.  The presence of love needs to be shown.  A smile, a thank you, a hug.  They all can do wonders.

'Hey you ok?.. you were very quiet today' 

Such a simple yet powerful text.  It brought unexpected tears to my eyes.  No one has really asked how I am in the recent months.  I know I'm the guy to internalize.  I hold in my emotions causing holes in my heart.  I let the stresses form ulcers in my stomach.  It felt nice to have someone notice that maybe I'm not ok.  My guard is falling and maybe that's not such a bad thing. 

Hey you ok?  Ya know, no, I'm not.  But that in itself is ok.  I'm the guy.  The one who will get through all of this with a smile on his face... just wondering if there might be a shoulder waiting for my head to fall when the weight becomes too heavy.